Hoping to watch more than just the average sappy romantic comedy this Valentine’s Day? Director McG’s new movie, This Means War, might just be your perfect fit. This PG-13 film offers more than just a cheesy love-triangle disguised by overly elaborate stunts. In fact, it is the perfect combination of being able to keep the female interest while not losing its male audience. Some in the room will be captivated by Chris Pine and Tom Hardy’s charming smiles and ripped muscles. And if you’re wondering what it brings to the table for the action-lover in your life, rest assured that the well-choreographed fight scenes, epic explosions, and many tongue-in-cheek jokes will entertain him for the entire hour and a half.
As best friends and partners in the CIA, FDR Foster (Chris Pine) and Tuck (Tom Hardy) have survived violent showdowns and cunning terrorist groups together. The movie opens with the pair at a glamorous rooftop party, where things quickly go awry. In an attempt to flush out and capture their wanted bad guy—Heinrich(Til Schweiger) – banter is exchanged, guns are fired, and what was supposed to be a quick, confidential mission soon turns into a hectic and very public display. From there, our leads quickly find themselves “grounded” to their desks by their sassy boss, Collins, played by Angela Bassett.
Enter Lauren (Reese Witherspoon), a witty executive working for a top product research company. After some awkward encounters with an ex-boyfriend, Lauren is thrown into the world of online dating much to her own dismay. Trish (Chelsea Handler) is Lauren’s sharp-tongued friend who creates a wild and colorful profile for Lauren in the hopes that her friend will find some eager suitors. However, to the surprise of both women, Lauren soon gets a message from a cute and seemingly normal admirer who turns out to be none other than Tuck. Walking on cloud nine after the pair’s first date, Lauren heads over to the video store where Tuck’s partner, FDR is doing surveillance on the pair to make sure the date is going smoothly. Like any other normal rom-com, the two run into each other and flirtation ensues. What sets this film apart is Lauren’s wit and dismissals of FDR’s advances.
Things change when the men realize that they both are falling for the same woman. So, what happens when two lethal CIA operatives vie for one woman’s affection? Well, things get messy. Some impressive—not to mention illegal—shenanigans ensue between the two agents, with Lauren oblivious to it all. It makes you think of what your date could possibly do if they had an entire government agency at their disposal. You might want to go delete those old Facebook photos now.
What is interesting about this film is that it has an unexpected type of humor that you normally don’t get with the typical “Nicholas Sparks-esque” romantic comedy. Everything from male genitals to the Patriot Act is poked fun at throughout the movie. This film surprisingly did an exceptional job at keeping the male audience sincerely laughing without alienating those who prefer more of the male leads’ sexy charm. It’s surely an entertaining film, but if you are unsure about paying the theater’s ticket price, definitely wait to rent it. If anything, watch this movie for the paintball scene alone; it will have you and your date clutching your stomachs in laughter.
Ever since the pilot, we’ve all been waiting for the engagement party of professional glarer Emily Thorne and gold-digger bait Daniel Grayson. The first few moments of the show reveals that someone gets a bullet straight to the back on the beach of the party, and that death will likely change the course of Emily’s plot to systemically destroy every J.Crew-clad Hamptons rich bitch who screwed over her father.
I know when I first saw the pilot, I assumed the stiff on the beach was none other than Daniel Grayson himself, along with the rest of the Revenge crew. However, in a recent issue of Entertainment Weekly, show creator Mike Kelley hinted at another outcome, and said “I don’t think anyone will have guessed it” and that the writers had “spent weeks” on this twist.
When I read that passage, I scoffed. Okay, Mike Kelley I thought, Let’s see you write your way out of this hole you’ve dug. After all, it would make sense that Kelley doesn’t want to see Daniel go. Josh Bowman (The handsome hunk of man who plays Daniel) is a fan favorite, and is well on his way to being a teen heart-throb. And, to his credit, we never actually see the face of the poor bloke in the pilot, since the beach is so dark and the body is face-down. The only indication we have that the dead body is Daniel is, y’know, the fact that his sister and mother keep screaming “DANIEL! OH DANIEL! OH LORD NO!” over and over again.
So I’m willing to play this game with the Revenge writers. If it’s not Daniel, who is it? And if it is Daniel, what’s the twist?
First, don’t drink. Or at least have an extremely high tolerance that may rival an Irish sailor. That’s key.Some might argue against this, but the most important thing in being the sober friend is to actually be sober. Alcohol can impair your judgment. Or so I’ve heard.
Next, be content while surrounded by a number of drunk people. You’ll most likely end up at a party in which the number of sober people can be counted on one hand. Maybe you’re on a schedule in which each of your friends has a weekend of be shitfaced with no scruples and no concerns about how they’re getting home—and this week, that’s your job. Or maybe you’re the most inherently responsible member of your friend group and know that when a rager occurs, you’ll need to hold back someone’s hair at the end of the night.
You might, then, decide that you need to develop horrible hearing matched with a lower sense of pride. When someone’s drunk, they begin to lose their sense of volume, always shouting embarrassing remarks no matter if they’re across the room or less than an inch away from your ear. Maybe they need to go to the bathroom, or maybe you should hook up with the guy you’ve been talking to all night. (Never mind the fact that he’s straight and the topic of your conversation was the NHL).
Have no qualms in treating your friends like children. If you see them about to take another shot, thereby pushing them over the level of pleasantly hammered and into horribly trashed, you cannot be afraid of taking the shot glass from their hands, telling them no and having a pout or weak slap to the arm as their only response.
Become good at controlling your emotions. It’s hard to be a hot-headed Sicilian and the sober friend at the same time. When your friends begin to call you by a different name, yelling that they cannot leave the party until they find the real you (you know, the hot-headed Sicilian and not the chill LA-boy) you’re going to need to keep your cool. When you live in a big city, it’s difficult to justify crossing the street and making them walk home on their own. That kind of attitude leads to mishap.
And for even the most non-motherly person in the world, chances are that at some point during the night your parental instincts will need to kick in. With judgments impaired, hook-ups and unwanted acts may occur and it’s unfortunately your job to stop them from committing any act that tomorrow morning might make them contemplate becoming a hermit for a few days. Bursts of spontaneous tears or even screaming matches can send you into a fight-or-flight situation in which you have no choice but to flee with them in toe. ‘I know, it’s okay. It’s okay,’ will be the only sentences you utter as you get your friends into bed for the night, checking at ten minute intervals to make sure they’re still breathing.
The night ends with a sigh of relief and exhaustion as you try to decide whether to scold them tomorrow or let it go. Either way, the first thing you’ll have to do is get coffee and bagels.
SWEET PRESENTS “THE OWNER’S SWEET” CUPCAKE PACKAGE
To cheer on the New England Patriots as they advance to Super Bowl XLVI, Boston’s favorite cupcake shop, Sweet, introduces The Owner’s Sweet cupcake package, a custom-designed football field of cupcakes ready to “wow” any Super Bowl party.
Please keep in mind that this year we’re looking for people with a deep interest and passion in their applied area - not necessarily someone with magazine experience. Through these applications we need you to show us that you are an authority on whatever aspect of the magazine that you are apply for. Please keep in mind that em Magazine is an involved organization that requires a solid commitment and in return offers a great addition to your resume as well as ample opportunity for growth. Read through the below positions thoroughly before applying. If there are any questions concerning what we’re asking for please do not hesitate to ask. These applications are due no later than 8pm on Sunday, January 22nd. We will be scheduling interviews for this upcoming week, in addition to the application materials asked for below, please include your class schedules. We will send out our response on Monday night.
For all applied positions, please make the subject “em Magazine - DESIRED POSITION.” Please attach any samples, resumes, or additional materials as a .doc or .docx, rather than a .pdf.
Writing Positions:All writer applicants are required to submit a one-page maximum detailed cover letter explaining why you want to be a part of em Magazine and why you want your applied section; a resume with relevant experience; two writing samples; and any additional material that you believe shows your voice and experience
Emerson Section (seeking 4 writers): This person should be someone with an understanding of the inner-workings of Emerson College — someone who knows what questions to ask an Emerson alum, someone who is familiar with the sub-cultures of Emerson, someone who is aware of the happenings around campus. This person should have an interest and talent for interviewing.
Looks Section (3): This person should not only be a great writer with a strong voice, but also knowledgeable about the fashion industry, trends, and designers. They should be able to provide authoritative commentary on the fashion world and be aware of how to write about fashion and design in a way that goes beyond the trends and focuses on the way in which style influences the world around us. This position is more of a time commitment, as the writer will be required to attend photoshoots to learn more about the clothing they will be writing about. This section is also looking for one writer with an interest and knowledge in the health and fitness field.
Relationships Section (4-5): This person should have an understanding that articles in this section look beyond the surface of basic relationship writing. We’re looking for writers with a strong personal voice who will be able to offer material that reflects their own voice, but also the voice of em Magazine. This person should have experience with college relationships and should be able to provide a refreshing and witty take. In addition, this person should be comfortable and experienced in interviewing people on personal subjects. We’re looking for outgoing individuals who do not have qualms asking personal questions.
Features Section (3): Writers in this section should feel extremely comfortable with the interviewing process and open to experimenting with potentially unconventional interviewing methods. All writers will be responsible with 1-2 articles from start to finish. These individuals should be self starters, well organized, have a strong voice, and ready to bring serious stories to life. Ideal applicants should have an understanding of what magazine feature writing is, in contrast to newspaper.
Entertainment Section (1): We’re looking for writers who have an understanding and interest in pop culture. It’s important that this writer is aware of more than just what is “hot” at the moment, but is able to predict growing trends in entertainment. We’re looking for writers who have a specific area of interest and are able to speak authoritatively and critically on that interest. More than any other section, it is important that this writer is comfortable with forming their own voice and using pop culture topics as a way to discuss greater societal themes.
Photographers: All photographer applicants are required to send 5-7 sentences detailing your personal photography style, what sets you apart from other photographers, and why you want to photograph for a lifestyle magazine; a resume; and 3-5 photographs showing your range.
Photo Editor (3-5): We’re looking for someone who is extremely skilled in photoshop. This person will be required to turn around unedited photos given to them directly after a photoshoot. In most cases, we will need these photos edited in a week tops.
Fashion Photographers (3-5): These photographers should be experienced and comfortable in directing models and developing concepts .They should know how various lighting features work and have a grasp on how they can further push the fashion photography in em Magazine. They should be able to reference other photographers and be able to call upon images/other photographers for inspiration.
Lifestyle Photographers (3-5): Should be aware or knowledgeable on how to shoot still life, buildings, and food in a way that presents the content in an original manner. This person should not be opposed to traveling to other areas of Boston in order to take photos.
Features Photographer (3-5): This person should be extremely experienced in working with subjects and models. They should be able to capture a personality and emotion in a photograph. This person will be asked to collaborate with the Photo Director and Features Editor for a concept on the main features spread. This person needs to be personable and make subjects comfortable.
Hair and Makeup Artists (2+): All applicants should send 5-7 sentences with what your style inspiration is and why you want to be part of em Mag; a resume; and 1-3 pictures of your work (even if this means grabbing a friend and taking a photo). We are looking for applicants who have a passion, knowledge, and talent in hair and makeup styling. Ideally, this applicant is someone who has experience in formal technique. Applicants should be aware that they will be counted on at every photo shoot and should have an open schedule.
Marketing Staff (2-3): All applicants should send 5-7 sentences of why you want to be on em Mag and a resume. Must be hard-working, self-starting, and highly passionate about working for the betterment of the magazine. Need to be able to work well in groups and to communicate effectively and in a timely manner with the Directors of Marketing and in general. All marketing staff members will be responsible for contributing during meetings as well as showing initiative and leadership when it comes to the acting upon ideas presented to the staff by the Directors. Individuals selected for the general marketing staff are expected to be dedicated as well as willing to learn during the semester.
Please direct all questions and applications to emmagonline@gmail.com
Have no qualms in treating your friends like children. If you see them about to take another shot, thereby pushing them over the level of pleasantly hammered and into horribly trashed, you cannot be afraid of taking the shot glass from their hands, telling them no and having a pout or weak slap to the arm as their only response.
